From Praha with Love
Here’s a post from our operative in Prague, a certain Mitch Cumstien, a young American doing valiant deeds overseas. This will be the first of several posts over the next year detailing his encounters with all things Czech.
Dude, what up man. you really have to have to get over here. i have to go, but ill leave you with a short story, my night last night. enjoy.
Last night, I met up with this dude that slangs the super chron. I hung out with him and his friends for quite a while, consumed many pints and many shots of Becherovka. After I attempted to stand up and take a piss I realized that I probably cant walk. So I held it in.
As fate would have it, a gorgeous piece of ass sat down right next to me, started speaking to me in czech, which is such a beatiful language when it comes out of a mouth like that. After we established that I was an American and spoke only english, the language of gods, we became quite chumy. After some light pecking and hand exploration, she asked me how old I thought she was. My response was 25, a seemingly safe bet. She looked at me, a little shocked, a little flattered and sad something in broken english that contained the number 17. Holy shit I thought, as i said “17!?”
A wave of relief washed over me as she said, “no no no, not 17.”
Then the knock out punch.
Not 17. Almost 17.
As my half-piss erection ran screaming back into my body I realized that there is absolutely no reason why I should give a fuck about her age. After all, the age of consent in this town is non-existent, or maybe its 15. Either way, I was in the clear, right? Wrong. As we continue the get to know each other process, she reveals that she has a boyfriend in the small town 25 km to the north where she is from.
Strike two, I’m not risking the third, which is probably a bottle to the back of the head. So i went home alone, again. But thats cool, at least I scored the chronic. The moral of the story is that stories shouldnt have morals.
I’ll write more later, peace to the gods and the mother earth.
Mitch Cumstien
